I know that the physiological arousal of anger is a problem, because I can feel how long it takes my body to reset and the older I get, the more precious that time is. My challenge is an ingrained habit of jumping too quickly to either problem-solve or minimize the issues. Sometimes the anger feels good because while I'm in it, I'm not doing those other things.
Anger can feel very good when we're in it, yes! Anger in itself is not a "bad" emotion; it's the way we express and act on our anger that determines its benefits and risks. Most of us have a habit or two we'd like to change -- me too! You may have seen this already: Here's an article I wrote about it earlier in the year: https://tammylenski.com/a-way-to-change-conflict-habits/. I reference James Clear in the article. His book Atomic Habits is excellent. Have you run into it?
I know that the physiological arousal of anger is a problem, because I can feel how long it takes my body to reset and the older I get, the more precious that time is. My challenge is an ingrained habit of jumping too quickly to either problem-solve or minimize the issues. Sometimes the anger feels good because while I'm in it, I'm not doing those other things.
Anger can feel very good when we're in it, yes! Anger in itself is not a "bad" emotion; it's the way we express and act on our anger that determines its benefits and risks. Most of us have a habit or two we'd like to change -- me too! You may have seen this already: Here's an article I wrote about it earlier in the year: https://tammylenski.com/a-way-to-change-conflict-habits/. I reference James Clear in the article. His book Atomic Habits is excellent. Have you run into it?
I didn't know of that book, thanks for the tip!